i have yet to figure out if im the type of person that puts up with too much, or too little. its hard to differentiate sometimes...in regards to different things of course.
so this post to the world of live journal is a declaration that yes, i am still alive, well, and bitching away as usual.
hello to all. i hope everybody is splendid, in robust health, and drinking their college/work life away, i sure hope the same could apply to me.
the last few weeks have probably been some of the most morbid ones ive ever had. its funny, you have a few bad days and its like youre put into quarantine from there on out.
i've been thinking of what to write in this damn thing (that's right i had nothing better to think about at work) for the better part of the day. i really wasn't going to update or do anything in the venting-type-fashion until i started losing my concentration and losing solitaire games, one after the other. it was heartbreaking. i guess thats my mind not being able to focus on other things very well because of the many thoughts running through my brain.
so...
before school started up again, an lmu freshman was killed in a car accident. in spite of her having lived a few feet away from me (she lived a few doors down across the hall from me in my dorm building) i cant say i knew her. the few times we saw each other, we just smiled and nodded at each other...a brief acknowledgement to each other on our way to do other things. so when i heard that she died, i cant really say i was too chuffed up about it. its sad, dont get me wrong but her death was just a little bleep on my radar that, in my "busy" life, went mostly unnoticed.
what really hit me, however, was other peoples' reactions to her death. people who never had anything to do with ally dewart, who, like me, had hardly noticed her, were finally taking notice. i know that in those few days after her death, when people heard her name and heard about her death, her facebook was probably the most popular facebook on campus. i dont condone curiosity, but it just seems to me that gawking at her facebook pictures, perusing her interests, and getting this tiny glimpse into ally's life, is a cheap thing to do.
ok maybe i do condone it a little, because all of this makes me think of my cousin. i know if christy had had a facebook or myspace, people would have gawked at it too when they heard she died. and this hurts, knowing that someone is only interesting and on peoples' minds, because they have died. to everybody else, ally's and christy's deaths are just "aw how terrible" thoughts, fleeting moments and thoughts that are quickly replaced by other things. but to the people who truly care, they think about that person for far more longer.
i dont know if this makes any sense, but its things like this that have been eating away at my mind, thus making me unfit for society in general.
so for this to be a real update, not just a rant, here are a few things that have happened in this old lady's life:
-a facebook diss (lame news, but hey its news)
-a job promotion is in the works (i'll be working at the library over the summer for training to become a student supervisor...$1.40 increase here i come)
-i lost my lmu onecard for the first time last weekend
-i made a friend!
-lauren and i had our first show on klmu....very few people listened of course.
alright im tired of this post. im out.
but before that, who wants to go with me to see electric six in march?
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peaceful
annoyed
sleepy
crappy
scared
anxious
accomplished
hopeful
stressed
quixotic
contemplative
blah
cheerful